The Chickadee Feeder

I walk demurely with my
bottom and hips in a straight line.

Do you suppose the ladies
who swing their hips as they walk lose more weight—and have better digestion?

If you suddenly see me sashaying
down the street in high heels, you’ll know why!

I’ve started using an online
diary to keep a calorie and nutritional record of what I eat; it is truly
helping me, MOST of the time….

I made a complicated dish
last night and ate a small portion of it, along with a bit of brown rice. 
Quite a job to calculate all the ins & outs of caloric content, carbs,
protein, etc.

At the end of the day when I
figured up the daily totals of what I had eaten, I was so shocked at how high
in calories that food was!  What a bummer.  Went to bed a little
hungry.

This morning I was kind of
light-headed and weak, and I just knew I hadn’t gotten enough to eat.  So
I ate kind of heavy for lunch, including another small portion of the new dish. 
Then I put it into the online journal and saw that I had now eaten almost all
of my calories for today.  
ACK!  SUFFERING!

Finally the rational side of
my brain speaks: “You know, that just can’t be right.”

So I re-figured everything
for that special dish and I was way off-base.  DUUUUHHH!!  Here I am
starving to death on account of poor math capabilities!!!!!!!!!

I guess I was wrong all
these years when I said that I would never need math.

Life is definitely looking
up!